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Hamstrings Are Lame

29 Jun

This whole “injury” thing is kind of balls. Let’s jut get that out there. So I caved and saw the nurse practitioner at my doctor’s office (I’ve never even seen my current doctor, because my PCP left and they just switched me to this guy but I’m holding out for a lady doctor… but I digress). When I explained my hamstring issue — heard a pop whilst stretching after class two months ago, felt fine except for a lot of new tightness/soreness, thought I could dance through it, realised I couldn’t — she immediately got this look on her face and I swear I predicted the words about to come out of her mouth.

“If it’s the ballet that aggravates it, you should probably stop…”

And I was like, ” YOU MEAN JUST FOR A FEW WEEKS, RIGHT?”

And I think she saw how serious I was about not quitting, so she caved and gave me a physical therapy referral. That’s the short version.

So here I am, taking a few weeks off from ballet and awaiting my first PT appointment next Tuesday. I’m a little excited about the appointment, not just because I can’t wait to get back to dancing, but because I’ll be going to a PT facility within walking distance of my office and they have a small dance studio on site to specifically work with rehabilitating dancers. The therapist I’m seeing is a dancer, too. I’m hoping this will allow me not only to rehab my angry hammy, but also to address some of the other little aches and issues I’ve noticed this last year or so.

That’s the Plus Side. The down side is that I don’t know what to do with myself for the next few weeks. It’s so weird to come home from work and not be rushing right back out to class. I suppose it’s nice to be catching up on some rest (and blogging!) but when I’m sitting here with a heated rice sock on the back of my leg, all I can think is, “I want to be at the barre!”

And the weirdest part is that I don’t feel injured in my day-to-day life. Can it even be called an injury, anyway? The whole point of resting my hamstring is to help it get better, and resting it makes it feel better (especially since I’m not actively doing the movements that cause it pain) so it’s hard to remind myself that I need to keep resting it and not just run back to class where I could do more damage.

At least I’m going away for the 4th of July weekend, so that will keep me distracted until my appointment where I’m hoping I’ll get some good news as far as when I can go back to class.

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Dream Dancer

26 Mar

I’m sitting here watching Phantom Gourmet, procrastinating just a little on getting motivated (okay, it’s 11am, so what!) and this seemed like a good time to run my mouth off in a blog post.

Anyway, I come before you today to talk about dreams. I’ve been having pretty vivid and interesting dreams all week, ranging from a trip to my family’s cottage in New Hampshire to a Pulp Fiction-esque nocturnal reverie (I blame this week’s episode of Community for that one). Last night, though, I had a lovely ballet dream. These are more and more frequent as my obsession — I mean passion! — grows.

In my dreams, I can developpé à la seconde up to my ear, hold my balance en pointe, hold my arabesque, pirouette (doubles! triples! en pointe!) … in my dreams, I am about 200% more talented and flexible than I am in my waking hours.

The first few times I had dreams such as these, I woke up disappointed with my self and with my limitations. Now I relish in these dreams! They inspire me, they motivate me, they drive me to be the dancer I am in my subconscious. At my age, I may never be that dancer, but the dreams push me to be better than I am now and that push is everything.

I’m stubborn, I’m a perfectionist… sometimes it feels as though I won’t rest until I get something right. Until then, I’ll always have these dreams. If my brain can do it, sooner or later my body will, too. Right?

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